Denial

So last week we read the the first and second chapter of The Total Money Makeover together. The first chapter was really a get-to-know-me  chapter showing you what the main focus is and also drilling your brain with the main motto "If you will live like no one else, later you can live like no one else". But as we sank into the second chapter I could feel a lump welling up in my throat (hmm, this was written for me). One of the first things it says is, "I'm not that out of shape". It starts out comparing your financial state to your physical reflection and image. This rang so clear and true to me because I struggle with an up and down weight and seem to either talk myself into believing it's not that bad or I justify how I got so out of shape (more than likely blaming someone else). It's the same way with our finances. We can sit and compare ourselves to others all day long and in some cases , make ourselves feel better. But we won't be able to begin to "trim the fat" until we acknowledge and accept how it got there in the first place. Ramsey's dad said to him many times, "90% of solving a problem is realizing there is one."  Now at first read of this I thought..well we know there's a problem.. We don't have an issue with denial.. So we can just move on..WRONG! So many money problems lie deep inside and hide in the most unsuspected places. Much like the comparison to weight loss. We feel so justified to say "well I had to eat that meal because someone made it for me" or "I will stop overeating after the holidays", "after vacation", "on January 1st".. I could go on and on. Well our money issues are so similar. How many times have I heard myself say, "well the kids have to have winter clothes" or "we really need this vacation" or "I'll cut up this card after Christmas" and  "this item is much cheaper if I order it online" ...you get where I'm going with this! If you don't do something about your eating and fitness habits you will gradually gain weight and with each passing year 1 pound becomes 30 and you're in over you head before you know it. Same goes for our spending habits. A $500 limit jumps magically to $1500 and one card becomes 3 and before you know it you're in over your head! I am totally preaching in the mirror right now. This chapter really slapped me around and made me realize that we don't need to just change the amount of debt we have but we need to completely change our way of thinking. Don't say,  "well we have to get the kids summer clothes and we need a tire so we will stop charging things after this" because that day will never come. Instead, we need to say, "Yes we need summer clothes but we don't have to complete our wardrobes today so we are going to start with shorts this paycheck and tackle shirts and swimsuits next paycheck." And maybe hit up the consignment shops before getting sucked in with the discounts and doorbuster sales. Now hear me with wisdom here, im not saying it's wrong to shop for nice things I'm just saying if you are in the same boat as us and searching for financial freedom, this is a good place to start trimming the fat. Every persons struggle is their own so examine your thought process when it comes to spending money and figure out how you can change your way of thinking. It will change your way of spending! I know this was a big wake up call for me this week. Selling our house and living all country like ain't gonna fix it (spoken in true country fashion). The real change will come when we take a look in the mirror, accept what we see, and do what it takes to change it.

Let me leave you with this story from the book:

"The story goes that if you drop a frog into boiling water, he will sense the pain and immediately jump out. However, if you put a frog in room-temperature water, he will swim around happily, and as you gradually turn the water up to boiling, the frog will not sense the change. We can lose our health, our fitness, and our wealth gradually one day at a time." 

 It's so easy to ease our way into debt and get comfortable with its effects on our lives. Much like the frog, little by little, we adapt to our ways and before we know it we're in too deep with no end in sight. I don't know about you but I'm hopping out of the pot now while I've still got a chance!!